Autostraddle
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Sometimes it's easy to think I'm the only one on earth that experiences certain things. Up until now, and even now, it is a spiritual dilemma for me.
Mine, then, would be narcissistic autoeroticism internalized rather than projected. Even though it feels like a curse.
Autostraddle - In my review I found the shot so hot that I could not let it go and kept going back to it.
Does autoeroticism denote a lifestyle preference, or general. Or does it allude to nothing more than the simple practice of masturbation—which is, after all, universally engaged in by heterosexuals, homosexuals, and bisexuals alike. And in attempting to distinguish among the various manifestations of such sexual expression, is it reasonable to eliminate from discussion asexuals, who at least as strictly defined are totally lacking in sexual interest—even though that non-sexual designation has at times been used interchangeably with autoeroticism. This post will attempt to clarify the different degrees and dimensions of autoeroticism. Hopefully, in doing so, it will help readers better grasp sex am auto intriguing dynamics of related sexual behaviors that, though not without their similarities, yet derive from different impulses, motives, and characteristics. To be adequately understood, its different manifestations must be understood. Moreover, it cannot be overemphasized that very few individuals do not—to whatever degree—exhibit certain autoerotic elements in their sexuality. So, to begin, what precisely is autoeroticism. Viewed literally, autoerotic individuals are attracted primarily—sometimes exclusively—to their own bodies. But appreciated more generally, autoeroticism involves a whole range of sexual behaviors and attitudes. Some might find themselves turned on both by themselves and others. Others might be aroused or arousable solely by themselves—whether through sight or touch. It merely refers to a particular sexual practice, preference, or orientation. It can be broadly described as narcissistic only in that it depicts a form of self-love, not necessarily mental or emotional although that certainly could be the casebut definitely physical. As the original Narcissus of Greek mythology became enamored of his own image as reflected in a pool of waterso can pronounced autoerotics be physically attracted to—or titillated by—themselves. In this respect, mirror sex might be seen as representing the ultimate in self-objectification. In effect, the potential frustration of not having sex with another whether male or female is happily resolved through their imaging themselves as that other. And moving farther out still on the autoeroticism spectrum, at some point autoeroticism merges with autoromance, especially if the individual has developed a strong, loving sex am auto connection to self. And that's why much of my preparatory research for this piece has needed to focus on Internet forums on the subject, as well as my own professional experience as a psychologist. In such instances, masturbation probably warrants being viewed as an expression of autoeroticism only in a limited way—though, granted, such self-stimulating impulses may in fact represent its most common form. Another way of comprehending all this is to view those who are markedly autoerotic as deriving sufficient sexual satisfaction through masturbation, whereas others even those who might masturbate more frequently than autoerotics might clearly experience greater pleasure through partner sex—that is, if it were as convenient or available. We can choose not only the best time and place for self-stimulation, but also the most titillating touch, movement including pace or progressionand position. And finally, we can take as much or as little time for our as we like. In the end, autoeroticism is best viewed as a more or less natural expression of our sexuality. And this is hardly anything to be ashamed of. Nonetheless, the great majority of individuals regardless of how many autoerotic tendencies they might exhibit show a decided preference for partner sex. For at a deeper level such encounters are more emotionally satisfying. On the other hand, those who are predominantly autoerotic seem more or less capable of having this same pleasing experience in solitude, since their pleasurably intense sexual relationship with self feels equally intimate and gratifying. Or they facilitate the process of turning themselves on by using various erotic or pornographic materials. As I pointed out earlier, libidinally self-contained as they are, fantasy and reality are barely separable. Their undraped bodies are catalyst enough to afford them the basis for full sexual arousal, since their self-directed vs. I'm in love with myself to the point where I would date it and with it. While I have some romantic attraction to females, I do not consider myself extremely attracted to women so I guess hetero- doesn't work for me either. Nope, I am just autosexual. This does not mean I am a raging narcissist. So, in a sense, these individuals are best seen as only peripherally autoerotic. On the contrary, however, there are many unqualifiedly autoerotic individuals. And because of their awareness that society in general frowns upon their sexual orientation, they regularly must wrestle with the inner conflict inextricably tied to their core sense of self. But I feel really attracted to myself, even in love. Other people do not give me the same deep emotional connection as I seem to have with myself. I think if someone cured me of this I would fall in an even deeper black hole of emptiness. Even though it feels like a curse. For whether or not our self-love is predominantly erotic, the healthy love of self is still our surest route to and well-being. © 2013 All Rights Reserved. As a gay man I think the dynamic is sex am auto different. I am a man and because I find men sexually attractive I therefore find myself sexually attractive. That is to say, the homosexual attractions beget the autoeroticism. Some have speculated that homosexuality is primarily narcissistic autoeroticism externalized and projected onto others. Often times this has been said to be primarily the result of emotional re-calibration from acute or insidious trauma being unconsciously sexualized. I won't rule that out as a possibility, but it seems to me from my experience that is not the case. I desire intimacy with others far than with myself even if I happen experience autoarousal. I am a man and because I find men sexually attractive I therefore find myself sexually attractive. That is to say, the homosexual attractions beget the sex am auto. Some have speculated that homosexuality is primarily narcissistic autoeroticism externalized and projected onto others. In my case, I believe myself to have an autoerotic relationship sex am auto myself despite being otherwise heterosexual. Mine, then, would be narcissistic autoeroticism internalized rather than projected. Most men, if being honest, would say that George Clooney is a handsome man and do so without fear of being homosexual, or so I would hope. I am not turned on by photos of men, and only get attracted by very perfect slim young women. Because I am aroused mainly by my appearance, I have faced the up hill challenge of more and more weights,exercise and perfect diet to fend off the ageing process. It certainly provides motivation to stay fit, and I have kept a thirty year old suit just to make sure it still remains a perfect fit. Time has been extremely kind to me, but it's running out. The future worries me a lot. The thing is, I'm almost paranoid about being 'found out', so I avoid anything that might look suspicious if I accidentally left it out. Besides old photographs make me feel sad. For the first time in my life I'm considering marriage, although I find very few women over the age of say 35 at all attractive. I wonder, have you come across ugly people who are auto erotic. Appearance doesn't always matter so much to some people I suppose. I'm not 'exclusively' auto erotic. I find women such as the one shown on the first page sex am auto arousing. But I could not cope with the emotions involved -- women are very 'high maintenance', and so opted out. How could I be attracted by women's appearance never men and also by my own appearance. I do not look effeminate. As regards marriage, if you really love a person, making love to them physically isn't merely about making love to a body but to the whole person--such that their relative attractiveness sex am auto be the deal-breaker. My problem with older, or physically unattractive women is that arousal might be difficult for me, however much I liked her sex am auto. I don't think pure love would be enough. After all, when we love someone, I suppose we love the 'whole package',so to speak, i. I have always thought of sex with anyone else as just disgusting male or female Yet I am very attracted to myselfI wear skintight jeans not to look good to other people but because I like to see my own legs. I have to avoid mirrors anywhere in public cause I do get very aroused very fastand have had embarrassing moments from that. I really only think I miss having a companion at times but not for sex. Most friends I've had I thinkthought I'm weird thoughbut I don't mind. I've hugged myself many times and just pet and touch my body in almost a romantic way alot and sometimes that seems kind of weird to me too. My difficulty is relating it to Catholic sex am auto on the subject. I have found some relief in the psychological sense by locating a nexus with self-love a new concept borne of this article with love in the purest sense that sex am auto by my Creator, as Sex am auto made me a child of Himself. I have a pastor who recognizes my problem. I am now divorced after 25 years. I have had a history of self-attraction as I now see it for over 60 years. Even when I was 8 or 9, that was an issue for me, and I have no idea how the concept took root, but I have had to live with it for all that time. It really came to a head no pun intended when I entered a minor seminary at the age of 12 and had to deal with this duality for almost six years at, God only knows, what psychic cost. It still feels weird and I have to spend more time sorting out the reactions. I try to be spiritual, not religious, about my life and think it extremely important to be thankful for what I have and sex am auto gotten, to share with others what I have because it isn't mine, anyway, but cannot shake this self-love you so eloquently describe. Up until now, and even now, it is a spiritual dilemma for me. But thank you for sharing. As a previous poster said, I have no idea where this came from. I only know that it is powerful and has been here for again, as the poster mentioned above, more than 60 years. The helluvit is, in addition to the turn on I get by engaging in trigger activities, such as body shaving, I also have a strong desire to act out in masochistic ways, and these are a powerful catalyst to arousal. My wife knows that there is a lot of stuff going on in me, and she doesn't like it; but she doesn't really know the extent of it and I am ashamed to bring it into the open. So, I have for many many years felt isolated. The sexual desire is like a capacitor. If I discharge the capacitor by masturbating, I am fine. And so, the cycle continues. Indeed, for some time now, I've been the object of my sexual desire, and this worried me immensely, because I feared I possessed narcissist tendencies. I thought something was amiss with me. As a gay man, I'm still attracted to sex am auto but, since I fear intimacy with others, I've just become comfortable with myself. I appreciate the information presented in this article, and I feel that I have a greater comprehension of myself. I'm often aroused by my own body while shaving in the morning and with a few erotic thoughts can stimulate and satisfy my self very nicely. Face it, you will probably have more sex with yourself through out your life than anyone else. My sexual experiences throughout my life has been so up and down it took me over 25 years for me to even understand that I without a doubt I'm autoerotic. Being with both man and woman I never seemed to have any true opposition to sexual preferences. I have enjoyed sex with women but have been with more men I guess because of the easy acceptance that men tend to have due eagerness to have sex. My autoerotic experiences began in the last few months of me being with my ex girlfriend a few years ago. I started developing this sexual itch for anal stimulation which I was unwilling to express sex am auto my then girlfriend for fear of being duped and label a homosexual. This sexual itch lead me to buy a vibrating sex toy I brought for my ex girlfriend to experiment with. She never used it and eventually gave it back to me. Shortly after she gave sex am auto to me we broke up over relationship issues. Being alone lead me to try out the vibrator I had brought for her. This then lead to dildos and which I had my first true orgasm, the rest was history after that. I began to excalade over the years in my autoerotic behavior by dressing as a woman which extremely truns me on because I know exactly what to wear and do to get and keep me in the mood for sex. Sometimes admittedly this compulsive behavior scares me because it's so outside of the norm my sense of alienation makes me feel like a sex God because my ability to masterful merge fantasy and reality. I've experienced what I believe to be the purest form of autoeriticism by dressing as a female having sex with myself while video recording it to rewatch while masturbating to what I created. Once you get to this point it's hard to turn back. In conclusion to my personal story I offer a word of caution. When tampering with sexuality it can be very difficult to return to normacy because the mind adapt to traumatic changes. If at all possible try to maintain some physical contact with another person because I believe it's healthier for your sanity in the long run but if you're truly satisfied continue in name of self love. Sometimes it's easy to think I'm the only one on earth that experiences certain things. Then I remembered the online sex am auto where I can find anything. I didn't know what to do when porn started to creep me out and gross me out more and more. Didn't want to take a shower because I'd need a long long time. Now I'm glad to know I'm not the only one who can't walk by the mirror without stopping to appreciate every bit of myself. I get aroused often when I see myself in the mirror in the morning. I'm a guy with a nice body with many attributes. I love to play around with photography and taking photos of myself and various parts of my body under different lights and situations. I then edit the shots and sex am auto review my work. Just this week I took a shot of my body length wise from above in dim light, slightly aroused. In my review I found the shot so hot that I could not let it go and kept going back to it. Around midnight I took another gander and became so aroused that I just exploded. Only recently discovered that I may be autosexual. I'm heterosexual male and have only ever had intimate contact with women. I got crazily aroused and excited by it. Initially I thought I might be bisexual but I don't find any men attractive. Then I thought I might be transvestite but I don't have any craving to wear women's clothing in my day-today life at all. I only ever do it to satisfy my own lust. I surmised that I must be some form of autosexual in that I would make love to myself - if I was a woman, combined with that fact that I only ever fantasised about oral sex with myself in the photos, never anal. I always feel like I am attracted to anyone, not just one end of the spectrum. I even sometimes talk to myself hehe. Since my divorce however I have exclusively been alone and it doesn't bother me at all. I actually seem to prefer it. I first discovered I was attracted to women when I was around 8 or 9. At the time I didnt know there was such a thing as liking more than one gender so I placed the label of a lesbian on myself. When I made my way into highschool, I realized I was still aroused by men aswell so I distinguished myself as bisexual. All through growing up, I never thought about my masturbation and sexual habits as bieng anything more than just me bieng young and horny. As I grew up and explored many different types erotica I found that nothing was quite as effective or satisfying as myself. I was still turned on by acts with other people but not as much by their body or their gender. I get off by getting others off, almost like I feel that I need to share myself and share with others that same enjoyment I'm getting from myself. Like when you tell someone that a recipe you made is amazing and they need to try it. I find that in a way I'm not even physically attracted to people, more just the idea of sex. As an artist I certainly appreciate the aesthetic side of someone with a perfectly proportioned and well built body or a woman with a perfectly slim waist and round boobs. Someone's genitals are not a point of interest to me, in fact I have found it can be a turn off if someone decides they just want to send me a picture of a penis. I would much rather see someone in peak condition butt naked but just so I can stare and be amazed. Genitals on anyone, to me just seems like something I know I can stimulate to make someone feel amazing and nothing more, no attraction at all. Like I said, sex with another person is not so much about their body for me it's about the feeling of sex alone both physical and emotional. When it comes to myself though, I love feeling my skin and seeing myself naked and I really get excited for the time I leave aside for myself. It's not just the feel of being touched in the right way it's the touch that's arousing as well, for example sure my hands on my boobs feels good, but the feeling of my boobs in my hands is just as good, where on another woman holding her does nothing more for me than the satisfaction that I know I'm making her feel good. I feel like it can be difficult to explain myself in this but in short -I am attracted to all of my physical and emotional self as well as aroused by myself -With other people I sex am auto not attracted to their bodies, I merely appreciate. I find the only reason I am selective in who I engage in sex acts with would be because of their emotional connection to me and because they are special to me, I share myself. It's hard to put it in words what the internal feeling is, but I've also had many one night stands, and I dont know if it was sex am auto I was searching for my sexuality or if it was me showing off in a way, sharing how great a partner I was. I guess the reason I put sex am auto out there, is because now as I am trying to start my life with someone, I truly feel bad. He feels like he can never be good enough for me because I enjoy sex with myself in a more wholesome way than I do with him. Sex with myself in my mind is everything someone would imagine perfect sex to be, with him and with other past partners there is no attraction, no excitement for their individual body and they feel that I am not fully satisfied by them. Sex with another person as I said, to me it is special to be with someone other than myself because I have a close connection to them and I feel like I could share what I have, and the arrousal only comes from the feeling or expected feeling. This is going to sound very self centered, but no one's love and romance will ever compare to the way love and romance between me and myself. Romantically speaking, everyone else will be second best. My love for my partner is still strong but that return of love will never feel the same. I love him no less than someone should love their partner, in fact in a way I feel that I love more deeply than most because there is no physical attraction there, purely emotional. I just don't want him to feel that he is not enough for me. I'm open to thoughts on my sexuality as well as thoughts on how I should be approaching my relationship with my partner in mind. The latter seems to have a more narcissistic theme. The limited research I have done on this subject has led to some interesting findings. In one case, the fantasy involved two physical bodies sharing a single consciousness, which is a fantastic construct if you give it any thought. These fantasies may well be a sexual manifestation of a component of narcissism. All that said, in the case of my own autosexuality, there is no self admiration or self love. In fact, I consider myself to be sexually unappealing despite having no concrete evidence to support that idea. It's more of a harsh self-assessment. The main theme has been to invent methods to maximize physical stimulation and the intensity of orgasm. The amount of success I have had in this area has enabled me to quell the otherwise nagging desire for relationships. I only really want the sexual aspect of relationships and thoroughly do not enjoy the other parts, such as the day to sex am auto activities and rituals that are expected. This results in considerable relationship troubles, and relationships that quickly die out after the 'honeymoon period' is over. As far as orgasm intensity goes, I've never been able to have such intense orgasms in partnered sex. Some may consider this to be a problem unto itself, but in my case acceptance of this has been more-so beneficial. I think autosexuality is going to see a sharp increase as more and more people decide to opt out of conventional pair-bond relationships. For many of us, it's far too much work for what we perceive as paltry rewards. Some believe that this is a problem rooted in selfishness, but perhaps that's just shaming language people use to explain something they really don't understand. The definitions of the words may need clarification. I think it'd be easier to experience a one consciousness, two body sexual experience, if we could jack our minds into a computer simulation, or even upload our minds to a computer, or even make a copy of our mind on that computer, insert a chip in our brain to excite the reward centres, and actually make love to ourselves. I'm just your marginal autosexual, masturbation while fantasizing about others. By the way one can get aroused by nearly anything under the sun, including the sun. Although affected people are very few. I am a male and I'm 18. I am not aroused by men. I'm slightly masochistic as well. Note: Ryona is not a form of violent attitude. You can search about Ryona in Google. I would never say any of this to anyone in person Ah. The beauty of the Internet. Now, now i know you're probably waiting for my point, welll long story short i find myself to be the most attractive thing i ever have and ever will gaze my ocean-blue eyes upon. But that being said i still find the human body Not just mine to be the most beautiful thing in the entire universe. My sex life consists of purely women and myself Masturbation. I could never see myself as being gay but if i could clone myself i wouldn't have to stare into a mirror everytime i walk passed one. Masturbating is slightly more amusing than sex but i love the worship i get from the women i sleep with. I can't speak for auto erotics on here but if you can relate to this you're probably similar to me and not justin Get it. I love the human body so much i am taking my mothers anatomy course in college next year. I would actually consider myself as autoerotic to a certain extent because I am exclusively a homosexual guy. Even when I hit puberty and started masturbation at a very young age by the way, I always felt a sense of mysterious sexual attraction to myself. I guess this is because I find male sexuality very very attractive. Hence I do believe my own sexuality does arouse me when I indulge in self pleasure. There is nothing wrong with it and I certainly feel no guilt about it. In fact I find it very enigmatic. Nonetheless I do have a very active sex life apart from self pleasure. I do believe homosexuality is primary a type of differentiated external type of autoeroticism. Male sexuality among homosexual men is something very pure and undiluted in its original form as there is no real compromise in sexual behaviour because does not involve the opposite sex am auto. This actually makes the sexual encounter very very erotically rich and immensely gratifying. Sex with guy is so pleasurable in some unique way because you really know the male body well, the arousing factors, etc. And it is something like intentionally splitting your autoerotic feeling into two to enhance the pleasure. For an example when you are at 69 position performing and receiving fellatio. It is just hard to explain it in words. In addition, I do believe homosexual encounter is primarily erotic in nature with a smaller sexual element. Heterosexual encounter on the other hand is sex am auto sexual with possibly a erotic element depending how it is expressed. Hence I think autoeroticism is how one would express and explore his or hers sexuality. Likewise homosexuality and its relation to autoeroticism. And there is nothing wrong with it, if sex am auto it adds diversity and makes human sexuality a very enriching experience. Makes being a human both joyful and mysterious. I have only gone on one date with a girl and have never had much inclination to come on to a hot guy. I don't want gay sex and, though I'd like some intimacy, I don't think I'd be emotionally or physically available to make a relationship worthwhile to the other party. I work out and lose weight to spice up my sex life with myself. Only recently has it dawned on me that the few men I do fantasize about each hold some aspect of perfection I seek to realize myself. The end goal of this perfection, for some reason, seems to be the glory of impregnating a woman in the sex am auto of physical perfection my perfection, not hers. In these fantasies, the woman's half all but disappears from view and the fantasy is really all about me. So, there is a narcissism about my fantasies-- as well as perhaps some misogyny and domination though not rape fantasy-- Any thought of hurting a woman is a huge turnoff.
Gedanken beim Sex
My love for my partner is still strong but that return of love will never feel the same. As a gay man, I'm still attracted to others; but, since I fear intimacy with others, I've just become comfortable with myself. Or they facilitate the process of turning themselves on by using various erotic or pornographic materials. Does autoeroticism denote a lifestyle preference, or general? I'm in love with myself to the point where I would date it and with it. I'm open to thoughts on my sexuality as well as thoughts on how I should be approaching my relationship with my partner in mind.
